Woke up at 10 or so and most people were up and about or out getting sun. Adam encouraged me to hurry up and shower so that the sun people had no excuses. Didn't matter, we weren't going to leave until uhh, 12:30 or 1 or so, because getting a tan is more important than going to the happiest place on earth I suppose. We ate some breakfast or lunch or something, and then very slowly loaded into the van to go to Disney land.
We drove and drove and drove. Adam put in the Rushmore soundtrack, only two skip through most of the songs, included skipping past "summer song" when there was only 30 seconds left. And why? Because people, as a general rule, suck. All trip we listen to bullshit a cappella and sickening pop and rap shit. While a few of us slowly wither away to nothing. A CD is thrown in that many people will agree with, and the cries of foul coming from one or two individuals ruin the whole experience. Excuse me, i seem to have forgotten that when in a van of Bostonians, the only opinions that matter are those that are not my own. So Rushmore was rushed through, but not without the few sweet moments of 70s britpop being ruined by bullshit comments like "my grandparents weren't even alive for this. Turn this shit off." And then promptly we put in the aladdin soundtrack, so that everyone in the van could enjoy the sound of their own voice as they bleated the words to the various songs. The comes the lion king, it gets to scar's song, i say "yay, i like this song" and some people agree, and it did get left on, but you'd think that in the act of listening to this one song, people were having their skin torn off. I always resolve not to use headphones on these outings because it is horribly anti-social, but i've about had it.
We got to disney a little shy of 2pm, and found out that the park was only open till 9. I was pissed, as was Adam, and i was hoping that everyone would enjoy their tans on the way home after we left without being to go on pirates of the carribbean or something. We all talked to Lori on the way walking to the trams, and then we got on trams, and i kept being concerned about the amount of time we had. It's the way I am, the same reason i get antsy about movie times, but this time i was very justified, it's disneyland, you need all the time you can muster.
After being greeted at the ticketline by the world's bitchiest disneyland employee, tickets were purchased, and we made our way to the flower marquis and then through the gates and onto magic street. Hooray for disney.
First thing we noticed as we walked in was that the castle at the end of main street was a joke, it was disgustingly small compared to its florida counterpart. It was really a joke, but i moved on. First stop was tomorrowland to pick up fastpass tickets for space mountain. Fastpass, for the unitiated, is the brilliant new brainchild of the disney parks, you walk up to a machine, send your ticket through, and get another ticket out saying "return in this slot of one hour to get on the ride with minimal lines" and you're allowed to get a fastpass ticket every hour. Genius. Then we went to honey, i shrunk the audience, which was good 3d show fun. And then to the matterhorn, which wasn't quite as fun as i remember from my childhood. Rickety as hell, and not quite as atmostpheric as i remembered. Then who knows, i think to space mountain. Which kicked the florida version's ass, it was darker, faster, and way cooler. Then indiana jones, which was new and fucking awesome. Passing indy we saw that pirates was closed. In fact, i think we did the haunted mansion before indy, we got stuck on the mansion ride for a bit, but it was ok. Still love the ballroom on that ride. Indy rocked. At one point, we were emerging from some ride and the parade of characters was going on. This was mike's first disney experience, and mickey was on the float, and mike ran up to see mickey, then walked back and tears were in his eyes. This is the power of fucking disney. Uhh, at some point pirates opened up. Cool as usual, has an extended opening boat ride which is different from orlando. And it's really cool, because the indoor set for this is absolutely amazing, you can't see the ceiling, and it looks EXACTLY like you're outside, and there's a fucking restaurant overlooking the boat path also in this little indoor/outdoor area and it's just the coolest fucking thing in the world. Uhh, we ate after pirates. Not at the restaurant in the ride, sadly, at $25 for an entree, it just wasn't gonna happen. But our meal was still expensive, it was a cafeteria style mexican/ribs place, $15 for a plate, but it was damn tasty. Hmm. We did splash mountain, which was smaller than orlando but still fun as hell, we did thunder mountain at night which ruled. After splash mountain, some of the kids went to go get pictures and make out with winnie the pooh, and i had my most brilliant thought of the day. Earlier, adam and i were discussing the best way to get thrown out of the park. And seeing winnie the pooh, looking all cute and cuddely in his costume, i figured out the primo way to be objected. You get a big, bearded, and smelly fat guy. Put him in a red shirt that doesn't cover his belly, and has "POOH" written on it. Then get him the little pooh ears they sell at the gift shops. He then walks around the park hugging little children. Anyway, back to the rides, I think i've summed up the majors. We got all the big guns under our belt. This, however, does not make my time concerns any less valid. There was NO ONE in the park today, there were no lines, it was some sort of miracle. We covered twice the ground we would have had it been a normal full day. After all the main attractions were taken care of, it was time to hit up fantasyland for some fun lame-ride action. Snow White, Peter Pan, Pinnochio, Mr. Toad, all wonderfully charming in their lamitude. Peter Pan was pretty cool though, only because instead of driving on the ground, the car was suspended as if flying, and at one point, there was a lit up map of london underneath you with moving lights for traffic and it looked damn cool. We did the merry-go-round, which i never understand. You go around in circles, whatever. Then small world, which is of course a necessity. Right as small world let out, we saw the parade going on, we ran up and watched with idiotic grins. And then the parade ended, a few of us booked it to space mountain for a closing ride, and we made it just in time, and it was faster than before and a great way to end a perfect day at disney. No, no, walking out of the park, the trees were sparkling with their lights and it looked magical, and then we saw mickey, and mike got to meet him, and we all got our pictures. That was the perfect end.
Learned something about disney today, every last ride is scary as fuck. Not so much space mountain, i mean, it's thrill ride scary. Not so much thunder mountain. Matterhorn has an evil abominable snowman and glowing red eyes everywhere. Haunted mansion starts off, with your narrator saying "blah blah blah, i soon discovered that there was only one way out." and then there is a crack of lightning and if you look up you see a man hanging from the ceiling. The way out was killing himself... CHARMING. And then the ride starts and is full of scary looking things and dead people and shit, and it ends with the speaker saying that the ghost we just saw in the mirror is going to follow us home. Pirates of C is full of skeletons in grotesque death poses, and has pirates running around raping women and burning villiages while singing a jaunty little song. Splash mountain starts of all happy, until we see a family of scared, impovershed bunny rabbits, and then we climb a hill and some vultures warn us of our impending death, and we go through signs that say "TRUN BACK NOW! DETH AWAITS" and then we plummit down and down. We are saved in that one though. Indy had the same good resolution, but was chock full of skeletons and snakes and scary things. Snow White has some of the most detailed and gruesome skeletons of the whole park littered about it, including hanging skeletons, and skeletons locked up with their arms reachign for keys and shit. Not to mention snow white ends after a frenzy of scariness with the last scene being the witch on a hill, adam said we're supposed to know she dies there, but shit, seemed pretty unresolved to me. And Mr. Toad. Fuck, man. Mr. Toad is the most fucked up ride in the world, i'd like to do my thesis on it. Here is the ride in a nutshell. You load into your little toad car, which is, by the way, stolen. You drive all over london, it is indeed a wild ride, you're turnign quickly, busting through things and walls, narrowly missing people, driving driving driving, UH OH, a train is approaching. Better get ready for one of Mr. Toad's famous sharp turns... NOPE. THE TRAIN HITS YOU. The next thing you know, you're still in the car, but everything is red... and hot... and what's that? OH, YOUR NEW LORD AND MASTER, SATAN. Hello satan, nice to see you, we're on a disney ride so we'll just be passing through hell. WRONG AGAIN ASSHOLE. The ride ends, and we're in hell. We have died and gone to hell. Thank you walt.
After we left the park we chilled in the brand new Downtown Disney area. Downtown Disney is a giant ass disney gift shop, and then tons of regular stores and restaurants. A pretty nice place. I felt obligated to get myself a souvenier, so i picked up a pooh notepad, because hey, i need a notepad, and adam said it was not much more expensive than at the bookstore. So, with notepad in hand, it was back to the van for me. And a not so long ride back to gantus'.
At gantus' some more drinking was done. It was the last night and i was determined to go out with a bang. So I drank and drank, and then around 1 or 2 got roped into a religious debate. I'm more than happy to participate, tonight on my side was me, with occassional support from Adam. On the opposing team was meaghan and sean. Offering occassional insight were oly and amy. I forget what the topic was. I think it was the argument that religion is the opiate for the masses, and catholics are hypocrites. It's the age old question that i posed to my CCD teacher some 10 years ago. me: "so, will jews and arabs go to hell? they don't believe in jesus etc." teacher: "they will not go to hell because of their beliefs. If they truly believe in hare krsna or whomever, they will be judged as a christian and will be sent to heaven to see jesus and understand that their beliefs were incorrect." And for a long time, the other side of this night's dialog was trying to defend my CCD teacher's claim while at the same time saying that catholics are open to other beliefs. Well, saying "you were a good jew, so jesus will be kind to you." is not accepting.
Here it is in simple terms. Faith exists. It is faith that causes you to believe with all your heart in God or whatever. Catholicism is not the most practiced religion on the earth. For arguments sake, let's say it's buddhism. Buddhists and Catholics believe in very different things. Each as fervently as the other. And yet catholics say "no way dude, jesus is it." and besically establish that the outnumbering buddhists are simply misguided. If you can refute this, do so. Otherwise, just accept that the only thing making your religion more real than mine is your faith, and if people can have different faiths that are equal in strength, then it only follows that there is no correct answer, only perhaps, the act of faith itself. Religion is designed, by man, to make that feeling of faith, that base understanding in all humans that there is something beyond our comprehension, approachable. Religion is there to assign names and dates and events to our questions. It is there to bring people of the world together for a greater good. It is the opiate of the masses. And true spirituality is all in the intellect, it's knowing that there exists that which we cannot understand. We'll never know if we go to heaven or hell, or if we're reincarted or just stop. So why bother to explain. Just let it slide man. Or if you're not willing to let it slide, consult with science, because science, while itself manmade and always faces the threat that it could be proven incorrect, is goddam near universally accepted. I'm not asking for a revolution. I just want people to say, "yeah, i don't know shit, but believing in christ makes me feel better" once we get people saying that, then we'll get to the greater good of people abandoning religion in general.
And after this 2 hour discussion, i suddenly became superdrunk and went outside for my nightly ritual. This time announcing it to those who were still awake. I was out there, cigarette lit, "olsen olsen" playing, and then Mr. Gantus appeared at the door. "We thought you had been eaten by coyotes" "nope," I said. And then started to feel water on my legs. "when did it start raining?" then i noticed it was sprinklers. I assured Mr. Gantus that the coyotes had not eaten me, and he left. And i continued my listening. I ran all over the place tonight, had a bout with a lawn chair in which i fought with all my strength not to fall completely to the ground, and i won. And jumped around some more. And then lied down on the ground, looking at the stars as the song finished -- all the while the sprinklers were drenching me.
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