Hmm. Woke up sometime in the morning, not feeling all that great. I found out that the reason i was visited by Mr. Gantus the night before because i was outside making coyote noises. Now i'm sure i was just singing along to the song, which for a sigur ros song basically means making coyote noises. Whatever.
Showered, donned the super fan shirt, and headed into the van. We were going to CBS studios for a taping of the Price is Right, via Hollywood. We drove for a bit, and got to Hollywood. The place is a fucking dive. If you've never been to hollywood, right this minute drop any conceptions you had of the place. It's sleazy, and dirty, and not at all glamorous, and we were right in the heart of it. All along our feet where the stars, emblazened with people's names, and to the left and right of us were shitty little convenience stores and trashy lingerie stores and crappy hollywood artifact knockoff stores. And we walked for about 100 blocks and got to the Mann's Chinese Theatre, which also looked totally run down. We saw all the cement handprints and what not, chatted with "Lucky Louie" who made us promise we'd bring him up at the Price is Right as two years ago he got on and kissed Bob Barker's feet, and then we left the shithole that millions of people dream about making it to.
Drove till we got to whatever city CBS Studios is. There is a huge outdoor food place next door called the Farmer's Market. People got food. I got breakfast, it was delicious, and it was run by some nice folks. We ate, and then marched across the parking lot to the studio. We waited around on some benches for a while across from a tour group from some retirement place. We started to sing and promptly got stopped. After some time we got our PiR name tags, and were instructed to hold on to them. Uhh, we waited for long time. And then we got cards with numbers on them, and were instructed to attach the numbered card to our chest and put our name tag over it. And we did. And we waited some more. Then they had us move to some other benches, which we did. We took this time to go to the CBS store. Mike got a survivor shirt that he's quite proud of. Then we sang a song and happy birthday to some girl, and then sat in our benches for a while more. Then, 20 at a time, the people waiting were called back over to the first set of benches. Eventually we got called. Over at the other benches, the routine was to go in blocks of 10 or so and talk to the producers. And by talk to the producers, i mean say our name and place and our business at the Price is Right. It's here where the decisions are made.
After our interrogations, we went around the building to an entirely new set of benches. It was here where we would be doing the rest of our waiting. We sang a song for the crowd, and then some asshole punk kid employee told us we had to sit. Then the people behind us got a collection going and we each got paid a quarter. And then we waited for a long time. Much speculation was done on which of us would be called down to contestant's row. We knew it'd be someone, we were 12 people dressed in idiotic bright yellow shirts. There was no question.
At a little past four, we actually got led in to the studio, like lambs to the slaughter. Up some stairs and anticipation was mounting... in moments, we'd be transported to the 70s. We'd be inside the goddam price is right set. There were some bostonians ahead of me, so i saw their reactions upon passing through the time machine. Finally, it was my turn, i took the step in, roamed the room with my eyes, and did the only thing I could do: laugh. I laughed out loud. It was ridiculous, i was in the set of the price is right, as a whole, it looked nothign like it did on TV, but the individual parts were exactly right. It was hilarious, the fucking price is right, the garish colors, the blinking lights. Everything from the room looked a good 25 years old. The sitting area looks nothing like on tv, i always remember the audience looking huge, and sloped, nope. It's a pretty small room, and the seats are very very very shallow. Whatever, we were at the fucking price is right. We took our seats.
It was bizarre, in moments, we'd be seeing bob barker, and one of us would be in contestant's row, and possibly winning a camper or something. We sat and bubbled with excitement. And then, fucking Rob Roddy came out. Mad, idiotic cheering spilled out of the very beings of the member made up of 300 college kids and senior citizens. And then Rod spoke, he talked just like he does on tv, and made lots of great jokes, and we shared a moment as he said something to me, but i was too busy being hypnotized by his jacket to hear him. He gave us the rules, told us what was expected of us, and said a lot of shit, and then brought on bob barker. More insanity of course. Bob said some words, and in no time the cameras were sweeping the audience so we could be surrounded by blinking lights and eventually beamed across the world. The first four names were called, none of them us. Someone won something, or lost something. Dimitrios was called up. In moments, some stuff happened, he was the closest bidder on a refrigerator, he, with one different pick of a card could have won a new car, and then he sat down to wait for the big wheel. Bob then addressed us. Said we could come down and sing soon. Then came the big wheel, dimitrios spun a dollar, getting him $1000, and then came very close to winnign an extra $5000 or $10000. And then bob called us up, and we stood on contestants row and sang 45 seconds of love the one, and after we were done he said that the boys in back said it'd all be televised. And then 3 other bozos won or lost stuff. And then the showcase showdown happened, since dimitrios didn't win the car earlier, and the other guy won whatever he won, dimitrios got last picks on the showcases. The guy was bidding on an SUV, a jukebox, and a rocking horse. Dimitrios was bidding on a piano, a year of flowers and a dinette set. Dimitrios bid 10,000, which we all thought was way low. The other guy bid $28000 which seemed right. Morale was down, we found out dimitrios was 5000 off, the other guy had it, until of course his value was revealed and he had underbid by $12,000. Hoorah for us. We ran down on stage and acted goofy for what seemed like for ever. And then we left.
Dimitrios had won$20,000 in cash and prizes. We had sung on the stage of the price is right and were all going to be on national TV for a good amount of time. It was unreal. And then back in the van where the moment was officially made annoying as everyone talking about nothing but just was a preview of what we all knew was to come in the next weeks. I didn't think i'd have the strength to retell the story here, but i managed.
Back at gantus', a final dinner, some madcap packing, goodbyes, and into the van. Drove to the airport, boarded a plane, instantly fell asleep. Woke up real pissed off, went to our gate in midway, almost lost my ticket, mike had thrown his away when we arrived at LA, boarded another plane, fell asleep instantly. Got a cab back to BC, slept for 7 hours, went to auditions.
the end.
| peterik@bc.edu guestbook |