self-titled: ^_^

"year 2: an embarrassing look back" is due soon. don't think i've forgotten about. it's just that computer games take priority in my life.

wow, this shit is like crack. i just started reading from march 30th of last year, when i resumed normal self-titled writing after the big 1 year gala event. the first night is when i nearly killed mancini after cafe party as we did shots at our kitchen table. and then i just kept reading and reading and reading. eventually, i cut myself off at marathon monday (don't tell brian this, but when i finish this, i'm going to read more.) it's crack, man. And i realize, this is why i keep this damn thing. i just read through 2 weeks, and relived my life. it was incredible. and it's crazy, like, what was going on then? back in the days when i hardly knew my roommates of now, i was head over heels for kate, i had just met tara, and i didn't really know brenda at all? i actually lived all this. those times happened, the way things are now aren't the way they've always been. i dunno, something about remembering those times does a number on me. and quite frankly, it's a little sad, there's a certain level of innocence when looking back a year ago, before things happened, before you knew certain people as you do, before you reached certain levels of comfort or familiarity with others... there are times you feel like you've just fucked up, and you want to go back to square one with a bunch of people. lost innocence, that's what it's about. anyhoo... i should really leave all this for the big 2 year gala entry, eh?

so today i went shopping. twice. and then i made eggnog for the big christmas party. oh, i went to two blockbusters too. the eggnog making was fun. i was able to crack eggs all by myself, and then after that, was even able to separate the whites from the yolks. so i made the eggnog, and then mike and chris came over and luke was home and joe came over and kate came for like 10 minutes. we watched gremlins. fun times. then mike was complaining of being too drunk and went home. i played an ill-advised game of beirut with joe (i won) and now i'm in here. i'll tell you what, i made some strong fucking eggnog. there was christmas music playing too when people came in. i dunno, it wasn't quite the blast i was hoping for, but i mainly blame myself for that. you see, i had lots of other things i wanted to do, but the truth is, the eggnog took so much goddam preparation and work i didn't have the time to do anything else. oh well, i got to see a little bit of a christmas story. unfortunately, home alone and a muppet's christmas carol will have to wait for a later day this week.

(and that means 'i love you')